Thursday, December 22, 2011

Delivering Christmas Gifts to BC Children's Hospital

Gemma and her parents, a family we've gotten to know!

Something you gotta know right off the top: I have a pretty amazing family.

For the last couple of years, our family has been purchasing gifts in memory of Josiah which we donate to BC Children's Hospital. This is something Marie and I have done on our own (as well as providing a gift at Josiah's birthday) and our extended family has picked up on it as well. This year we added a second gift in memory of my dad who also gave to BC Children's during - and after - his grandson's time there.

Our niece - ever the entrepreneur at the age of six - has been finding creative ways to buy gifts for the children who are hospital-bound during the Christmas season. This summer she started raising chickens on the farm, collecting and selling the eggs, and then using the money to buy gifts for kids.

Wow. Just wow.

This past Monday Marie and I (with the help of our Aunt Chrystal and our cousins Rachel and Denver) delivered gifts to BC Children's Hospital. It was a good and sad thing. A few familiar faces, lots of familiar sounds and smells that bring back so many memories.

Marie and I have learned to brace ourselves for our inevitable responses that come from returning to the hospital: irritability, solemness, echoes of past anxieties, and alike. We warn each other about how we might respond, try to be gracious with each other and be quick to forgive when we lash out. Some days we do better than others.

Return visits have not become any easier, but they are fewer now since now we only return to bring gifts. The families we got to know have all been discharged - praise God! - yet there are a few staff members that we consider friends and try to remain connected with.

As difficult as it is - and it may sound odd to others who also grieve - but we have found meaning and healing by 'forcing' ourselves to keep BC Children's as a part of our seasonal rhythm. A part of stepping forward - for us at least - is to maintain 'markers' and traditions throughout the year that remind us of our son and what God has led us through. But keeping links to our past - thus, as a result, re-entering the grief and the pain each time - we move forward with hearts that are heavier but healthier. This may not be how all people grieve, but this has been our experience.

To all those who are - out of consideration for our grief - praying for our family this Christmas, we give you our humble and sincere thanks. There is much I am dreading as Christmas Day approaches. Yet, I am reminded that Christ's birth points us to his return, and so I lift my gaze forward to anticipate our Savior's next coming when all will be made new.

Hope and Comfort, Grace and Peace.
- Andrew

2 comments:

Kelly Tyler said...

I left this message on your other blog but thought you may not find it once I saw this one. :)

Kelly Tyler said...
I cannot thank you enough for sharing your son's beautiful story. I am weeping as I write this. You see, I have a beautiful Josiah too. He was born early, blue, wouldn't breathe and had a dismal prognosis. He was a miracle; born to a mommy who is a quadriplegic. He beat the odds.He has turned our lives on end and I can't thank God enough for him. He is beautiful. He is different. He has High Functioning Autism, Mood Disorder NOS, Sensory Processing Disorders, suffers greatly from depression and has recently struggled with suicidal thoughts. He saw me weeping and asked why. I told him about your baby Josiah. His eyes were wide as he realized the similarities. He said, "I'm glad I'm alive." That is so different from what he has been saying. Your Josiah is still touching lives! God bless your family.

Kelly Tyler

I would love to send you a free copy of my book. Just leave a message with your address on one of my blogs. www.livethecall.blogspot.com

Andrew said...

Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your story Kelly. I look forward to reading more at your blog!